A story to tell (for the Omaha World Herald!)

OK, so I'm a little hesitant to write about this because I don't know all the details, but as my faithful followers (we're up to 16!) I thought you'd like to know that I've been hired by the Omaha World Herald to write a column for their women's magazine, Momaha, that comes out monthly. I haven't been updating my blog because ever since I received the news, I've been paralyzed with fear that nothing creative or funny or remotely interesting would ever come forth again and what if I only have one funny thing each month? What if I use my only funny story for the blog and then I'm left with nothin' for the column? The minute I said yes to the column it was if my life became boring and dull and not in the least blog-worthy. A couple of weeks ago, driving back from Texas I started to panic that perhaps my trip would be completely normal and I wouldn't have anything to share. No tow trucks; no rental cars; no broken DVD players (well, yes, one broken DVD player). And it pretty much did go as planned, although I will say that when traveling through Oklahoma and Kansas one needs to be very prepared for a L-O-N-G stretch of highway in which there are no gas stations.

My new van (hooray for 2 car families!) has the 'distance until empty' feature and I was just so excited about it that it seemed such a waste to gas up when I had a full 87 miles left. After a very nerve-wrecking drive with a flashing sign that read low fuel (uh, duh! I know), I finally found gas. I had been driving 60 mph without air conditioning in an attempt to use less fuel and praying a lot! Emma Claire, sensing my mood, said, "Mom? Why are you so nervous?" When I finally saw the station and filled up a 19 gallon tank with 18.87 gallons of gas I said, "Emma Claire, say 'Thank you, Lord Jesus!'" To which she replied, "Mom, can you say it, please?" I guess that's only fair. I was the one after all ,who didn't want to stop with 87 miles left in my tank.

Anyway, as I was saying, nothing funny, nothing interesting; nothing of anything and then this morning, after arriving an hour late for Coulter's camp without a lunch or sunblock (evidently I should read more) and after driving to Walmart and then back home again because I couldn't find my wallet (smushed under paint buckets, but in the car the whole time) and then after going back to Walmart, I walked out with diet cokes and bread in hand (I've quit cooking until we move and I have a kitchen in which the smoke alarm does not go off  every time I turn on the stove, which makes for a pretty short grocery list.) Anyway, I walk out only to discover that the lady next to me had been sitting in her car for 1/2 an hour waiting on me to return because I'd left the side door of my van wide open and she didn't want anyone to steal anything. Let's see, what could they have stolen? Umpteen gallons of paint? Light fixtures for the new kitchen and den? My purse? Yes to all, and that's when it dawned on me that based simply on the fact that I'm the kind of person whose son will have to go hungry for a day and who loses her wallet in her own van and locks her van without actually closing all the doors, yep, that's when it dawned on me that I have nothing to worry about. There will always be a story to tell!